During a visit to America, Churchill was invited to a buffet luncheon at which cold fried chicken was served. Returning for a second helping, he asked politely, "May I have some breast?"
"Mr. Churchill," replied his hostess, "in this country we ask for white meat or dark meat." Churchill apologized profusely.
The following morning, the lady received a magnificent orchid from her guest of honor. The accompanying card read: "I would be most obliged if you would pin this on your white meat."

Entering the men's room in the House of Commons one day, Churchill found Clement Attlee alreayd standing at the urinal. Churchill took up his stance at the opposite end of the urinal. "Feeling standoffish today, are we, Winston?" asked Attlee. "That's right," replied Churchill. "Every time you see something big, you want to nationalize it."

At a dinner party one evening, there was a heated exchange between Churchill and a female MP. At the end of the exchange the lady scornfully remaked, "Mr. Churchill, you are drunk. You are very drunk."
"And you, madam," replied Churchill, "are ugly. You are very ugly madam. But I shall be sober tomorrow."